Why do I insist in pushing myself so hard? Because I’m self-destructive? Because the fun starts where my comfort zone end? Because I want to be able to do what the others do? Because I’m too anxious to think about staying where I am and because I’m too anxious to actually move on? Because it’s no big deal after all? Because if I don’t I would die? Because I’m stupid? Because I get bored easily? Because I actually want to move on, be heard, be respected? Because I know that I won’t move on, be heard, be respected? Because it doesn’t matter anyway? Because everything I do will turn out to be a giant hole that will blow everything away?

"   The fact that I’m silent doesn’t mean I have nothing to say.   "
Jonathan Carroll (via refuser)

(Source: hellanne, via dream--obscene)